In Summer School....Again

Well the 2nd "quarter" of Summer school has started and I'm back in the classroom. Bleh. Even though I need these credits, I really wish I didn't have to do this. But at the same time, I'd rather endure three weeks than spend a whole semester practically doing nothing. Either way, school is beginning to suck. And the school year hasn't even officially started yet.

Senioritis is already having minor outbreaks across Utah County.

Anyways, I got into a fight with my parents last night because they wouldn't let me go to the pool with my boyfriend and some other friends. She was mad that I went bike riding with Jon around the neighborhood and didn't tell her, even though some of my other YOUNGER siblings leave the house whenever they feel like it and rarely are punished for it. The amount of tension over this disagreement was insane. I was and still am angry. And it's not even about the pool or the fact I didn't get to spend more time with my dear boy, though I really wanted too. It's the fact that I feel like I am under house arrest. I only leave the house for school, lessons, or family activities. I can't do anything without parental jurisdiction. My mom says my lessons and extracurricular are me getting out the house. While it is a nice break, it's not always fun. It can be really stressful and it isn't quite the same as just hanging out. In fact, it hardly counts as socializing because I don't say hardly a word. During lessons, you are suppose to be listening to instructors, not gabbing about.

Though I really do appreciate my lessons, I want some just fun time. Just fun time. Anti-family fun time. I want to lounge about and goof off and gossip a little bit and have a night on the town. It's my last summer vacation. After I graduate, summer is no longer a break. It's just a season. And I want this summer to be the best.

Instead, I am usually stuck at my house with no car, no money, and no friends. If I do leave the house, unless it's for summer school, my mother is my accompainment. No offense Mom but I've been playing with you since the ripe age of 1 week and I kind of want to go play with other people now besides you. And when I try explaining to her how I feel, she goes on some tangent about how I'm acting like an immature, irresponsibly 17 year old who will end up dropping out of college because I just went and had fun instead of studying. And I have to disagree. Right now practically all I do is study. I go to summer school. I attend our yoga class. I go to my ballroom and ballet lessons. I practice my dance and do my stretching almost everyday. I do my chores. I get anything I need to get done, done. NOW WHERE THE HECK IN THIS EQUATION AM I ACTING LIKE AN IRRESPONSIBLE TEENAGER?

I can't wait to move out. Not because I want to go party hardy every night in college. I want my freedom. If I am done with my responsibilities, I want to be free to use my time how I wish. I want to go to the pool when I want too. I want to go hang out with my friends if I wish. I want to socialize with whom I want to socialize. If it's time to study, I will go study. If I have time to play then darn it I want to get out of the house and play.

Inspiration can come for sheer boredom. Who knew?

Hey so since I have to finish credits by taking summer school and summer school is wicked boring, I've had a lot of time on my hands sitting at my desk. As a result, I've started writing lyrics for around 5 new songs. Yes I'm really bored. And honestly have nothing better to do then come up with rhymes and count out syllables and all that jazz. So I will be posting a lot of lyrics and whatnot soon.

Oh I even wrote a poem the second day of class------

ODE TO SUMMER SCHOOL

This is a poem about being bored

Which I assure you, I am

She just keeps talking and smiling and grinning

And in fact, she's driving me mad

The classroom is quickly and surely becoming

My own personal hell

There's nothing to save me, nothing at all

No, not even a bell

And the busy work is driving me crazy

As it cramps up my fingers

There's no reason, not a single purpose

Except maybe to make me hate this teacher

If I have to open that book one more time

I swear I might rip it half

Maybe this makes me cheeky or maybe a brat

Either way, I know I'm being a smart ***

But if you had to sit in this room

For fours every morning for fifteen days

With these uncomfortable desks and the way this woman teaches

You too would also go insane

I love how eloquently I described my school setting.

Anyways really though it's not that bad and the teacher is nice. But I am telling you the first few days stunk.

PREVIEW OF A SONG I'M GOING TO POST:

I've heard you say it a thousand times

I think I've heard it almost every night

I love you

But I don't think you mean it when times get tough

When we fight, when the going gets rough

Do you know what I see?

You can't imagine the pain you put me through

And I use to say I'd do it again for you

But would you want me to?

Would you want me to?

A Review on North and South and Criticism of Reactions to the Depiction of the Victorian Era in Modern Media

BBC's adaption of the Victorian novel North and South, though long, is an excellent film. Though all the actors in the piece primarily specialize in television, I'd have to say the acting was top notch. Every performer played their parts well, realistically incorporating specific traits into their characters while maintaining the minimalistic movement required for film acting. Daniela Denby-Ash, though mostly an unknown, played the leading lady beautifully, both portraying the honesty and kindness of the character Margaret Hales as well as the strength. I particularly admire her skill because most actresses tend to make ajenue characters seem rather pathetic and weak. Denby-Ash shows both power and humbleness in a subtle human way. creating a character that can be easily connected to. Richard Armitage as the formidable Mr. John Thorton aslo did an amazing job. The part of Mr. Thorton could easily be a confusing character with his almost bipolar personality swinging from rage and coldness to the upmost sweetness. However, Armitage performed his part with finesse and allowed for the audience to understand his reactions, really delving into the character's physchology.

The relationships between the characters was also very natural. It was exceptionally easy to believe the connections of each character to another, particularly Margret Hale to her family. The role of youth to parent was very real, the affection between Margaret to her parents seeming natural. I could not help but compare it to a movie I watched just the other day exploring the relationship between a teenage son to his parents. During that particular movie then relationship felt forced and fake. In North and South however, the family seemed perfectly comfortable with each other just like a real family.

The set was also exceptionally good and realistic. I especially praise the multiple sets of the industrial city of Milton. I congragulate the props masters. The set of Milton captured the smoky, grim, and somewhat obscene atmosphere of the slums, working conditions, and overall streets in industrialized towns during this time period. Cotton bits where flying around, black smoke coming from chimmneys, soot on the walls, just subtle signs here and there. I swear in the background of one scene, there was a cart outside of a butcher's full of pig heads, which is quite accurate to the enviroment at the time. Simaltaneously, nothing shouted oh look we're trying to create a phony 1800's city.

I do, however, have two criticisms. The first being Margaret Hale's wardrobe. I understand Ms. Hale is a middle class citizen. But I'm sure she can have more than three outfits. And for goodness sake, she doesn't need to wear the same hat in every scene. By the second episode, I had already seen the brown hat a million of times and wanted to rip it off her head. Maybe it's something taken from the book-I don't know. But I will tell you this; one film that hat got really annoying, really fast. My second criticism would be the ending. Not that I have a problem with the plot's ending-oh no quite the opposite. I do however have a slight problem with editors and screenwriters. The ending seemed to come to quickly with little attempt to pace the story. I didn't seem right. As if, huge chunks of information and resolutions had been skipped over. It felt force. For instance, we don't even know exactly why Mr. Thorton is in the finacial situation he's in or how Henry came back into the picture. It just sort of happened. To me personally, it felt like "Oh my gosh we only have a half hour to fit the rest of the story into. So let's just shove bits and pieces here so we can get to the end."

Now I have a few things to say to viewers. One, and this is mostly directed to my teacher's AP English students (but anyone else who thinks like them go ahead and read), this movie is NOT a chick flick. I repeat North and South is NOT a chick flick. It is a period film. It might also be classified as a romance but for the most part is a Period Film. In fact, I find the romantic aspect of the movie is mostly a subplot. The main focus for the duration of the film is the social and economic turmoil as Northern England industrializes. It is more of a criticism of social conflict, then a romance. We see the factory workers strike, the effects the factories have on the employees, the slums of the city, the financial situation of the factory owners, the conforming of the Church of England. The main point of the story is not about a girl who lives happily ever. after. It is about a young woman who is thrown out of her element and opens her eyes to the problems around her. In a way, it's a buldingsroman, or a coming of age story. Just because two people fall in love and kiss at the end does not make it a chick flick or even romance. People fall in love and kiss and do other things during action films but you wouldn't call those chick flicks. For crying out loud, there's even a little romantic plot during Napolean Dynamite. Just because there is not explosions or stupid yet comical high school boys does not qualify it a chick flick. AGAIN IT IS A PERIOD FILM. (And netflix agrees with me)

Secondly, the film/book have been criticized of mimicking Pride and Prejudice. I will try to make this short but explanatory. North and South was written by Elizabeth Gaskell. During the 19th century Gaskell was actually a more popular writer than Jane Austen-quite the opposite of today. Gaskell was however more well-known and read. It is unlikely Gaskell stole Austen's idea. Another point would be that the relationship between Margaret and Thorton is a popular, almost generic concept. This is not because it is cliche. It is because it is real. It happens all the time. People often get bad impressions of one another but find that maybe they aren't so different after all. I'm sure almost everyone can name at least one person they were not so fond of at first but grew to like as a friend, love interest, whatever. I myself could probably make a long list-including my current boyfriend.

In general, I would now like address reactions toward the Victorian era in the media and literature by the masses today. I find it very distasteful how it is often found by people in the modern world as sissy or associated with chick flicks. Those who believe so are obviously uneducated in Victorian culture and displaying signs of narrow-mindness. One reason I think people call it so is because it deals primarily with marriage. My first point would be is since when in the history of the world marriage girly? For pete's sake, if you haven't noticed marriage is a common practice and is a union between (oh my goodness prepare yourselves for this one) woman AND man. There is nothing feminine about it. It's unisexual. It takes commitment and work from both partners and I think many people would agree that their marital relationship is not exactly the easiest thing in the world.

But you may ask, "Why the obsession with marriage and love?" I don't think you realize how important marriage was at the time. It was vital, especially for women. If a woman ever wanted a substantial income, their only choice was marriage and this is hardly a generalization either. They could not legally own property or inherit. The only money or living support they would recieve would be from their families as they grew up or from their husbands when they became adults. In that world, a young lady could not survive without a good marriage. And the women did anything to get married. I'll tell you it wasn't just primping up for balls and parties. Oh no. Here's something they leave out of the movies. Did you know many women during the 18th and 19th centuries had surgeries done to remove their bottom ribs so they could fit into their corsets? Later in life this caused health and back problems. Want to know why anyone would subject themselves to that pain? Because most men wouldn't marry a girl if he couldn't fit their hands around their waists so that their finger tips were touching. Especially the higher class-the men women wanted to marry the most to provide them security. I tell you, the society back then was brutual. Absolutely brutual. That is only a small sliver of the social atrocities.

The criteria for being an eligible young lady was almost impossible. It included refinement, education, multiple talents and interests, appearance, beauty, decorum, and basically a modelment of perfection. And with so many people aspiring to be the perfect wife, the competition was fierce.

I've heard Jane Austen criticized multiple times for being a feminist. Or a sexist. She is neither. Anyone who says so doesn't understand. Her characters are in common situations for the young women back then. She is showing how hard it was for women to find a good marriage. One with both love and financial security-something that rarely happened back then (it was usually one or the other). And it's not exactly an area she is unknowledgable in either seeing as she never got married herself. She died alone and unmarried with the person she would've liked to marry wedded to someone else. Becoming Jane is not a completely unaccuarate movie. There are signs that Austen had romantic feelings for Tom Lefroy. It cannot fully be determined exactly what happened since her sister burned documentation on the event to protect Austen's privacy, there is significant evidence. She lived a very sad life and as a result, wrote her characters to have the happy life in the end that she never had while first going through the difficult social and courtship formalities.

I will close now since this is so short but honestly this is only a fraction of what I could say on the subjects embodied within these paragraphs so if anyone would care to know more simply ask.

A recent song I wrote

OCEAN

By Bailey Loveless, May 2009

That ending was quite abrupt

You give and you take

And it's never enough

Hush now, and just stay with me for a while

Let us sing, let us love

Watch me look at you and smile

Why do you pull away?

Why do you go away?

CHORUS:

The ocean is flooding

We're crumbling over

The water keeps rising

And we're going under

The physcians say they do no wrong

I'm sure they'd sue me 

If they heard this song

If only we knew what they had read

When we cry, when you leave

When you stand still in my head?

Why do you pull away?

Why do you go away

When I'm falling over?

CHORUS:

The ocean is flooding

We're crumbling over

The water keeps rising

And we're going under

And I don't know how to instruct this heart

When you and them are taking it apart

I hear the waves crash down though the ocean is far

And the sea rises up to reach for the stars

CHORUS:

The ocean is flooding

We're crumbling over

The water keeps rising

And we're going under