In Summer School....Again

Well the 2nd "quarter" of Summer school has started and I'm back in the classroom. Bleh. Even though I need these credits, I really wish I didn't have to do this. But at the same time, I'd rather endure three weeks than spend a whole semester practically doing nothing. Either way, school is beginning to suck. And the school year hasn't even officially started yet.

Senioritis is already having minor outbreaks across Utah County.

Anyways, I got into a fight with my parents last night because they wouldn't let me go to the pool with my boyfriend and some other friends. She was mad that I went bike riding with Jon around the neighborhood and didn't tell her, even though some of my other YOUNGER siblings leave the house whenever they feel like it and rarely are punished for it. The amount of tension over this disagreement was insane. I was and still am angry. And it's not even about the pool or the fact I didn't get to spend more time with my dear boy, though I really wanted too. It's the fact that I feel like I am under house arrest. I only leave the house for school, lessons, or family activities. I can't do anything without parental jurisdiction. My mom says my lessons and extracurricular are me getting out the house. While it is a nice break, it's not always fun. It can be really stressful and it isn't quite the same as just hanging out. In fact, it hardly counts as socializing because I don't say hardly a word. During lessons, you are suppose to be listening to instructors, not gabbing about.

Though I really do appreciate my lessons, I want some just fun time. Just fun time. Anti-family fun time. I want to lounge about and goof off and gossip a little bit and have a night on the town. It's my last summer vacation. After I graduate, summer is no longer a break. It's just a season. And I want this summer to be the best.

Instead, I am usually stuck at my house with no car, no money, and no friends. If I do leave the house, unless it's for summer school, my mother is my accompainment. No offense Mom but I've been playing with you since the ripe age of 1 week and I kind of want to go play with other people now besides you. And when I try explaining to her how I feel, she goes on some tangent about how I'm acting like an immature, irresponsibly 17 year old who will end up dropping out of college because I just went and had fun instead of studying. And I have to disagree. Right now practically all I do is study. I go to summer school. I attend our yoga class. I go to my ballroom and ballet lessons. I practice my dance and do my stretching almost everyday. I do my chores. I get anything I need to get done, done. NOW WHERE THE HECK IN THIS EQUATION AM I ACTING LIKE AN IRRESPONSIBLE TEENAGER?

I can't wait to move out. Not because I want to go party hardy every night in college. I want my freedom. If I am done with my responsibilities, I want to be free to use my time how I wish. I want to go to the pool when I want too. I want to go hang out with my friends if I wish. I want to socialize with whom I want to socialize. If it's time to study, I will go study. If I have time to play then darn it I want to get out of the house and play.